"Mommy why are you fat?”

Today I have decided to change my life. The realization recently hit me like a ton of bricks. Which came courtesy of my eight year old son. With love and concern he asked me flatly, "Mommy why are you fat?" My family chided him but he was doing what kids do. He was being honest.

Today I went to a FB page called Black Women Do Work Out. Looking at the pictures truly affected me. It is an inspiration to see healthy women in fanastic shape who look like me. The women were all sizes and ages. The page quite honestly forced me to reflect on my lifestyle, my choices and the kinds of food I consume. What I realized is that I eat food out of emotion and not hunger. I eat (not the healthy foods either) when I am happy, sad and or just plain bored. That is unhealthy and down right nuts.

Society constantly floods us with images that perpetuate unhealthy stereotypes and lifestyles of black women. Sadly, we reinforce this. Ever heard anyone say, "It's great that you want to lose weight but you don't want to be white girl skinny"or "you do not want to lose your butt." I unfortunately have. It's sad that it is 2010 and people believe that fitness is an attribute exclusively for white people.

I am a educated, smart and fun individual. Or at least that is what my family tells me. My behavior and personality is hardly stereotypical. However, as hard as it is to admit, my eating habits and my body are. I eat anything that has been fried, processed or BBQ'ed and I rarely eat fruit or veggies. I am at the heaviest I have been and that includes my two pregnancies. I am 5'3 168lbs. My body is composed of 29.6% body fat.

Gandhi said, "Be the change you want to see in the world" and he was right. If you are defying stereotypes (as a black woman I always am) the best thing is not to be one. Most importantly as a parent I am an example and role model to my children. It's time for me to do what I tell them to be. To aspire to be the best example and me I can be.

Growing up I was taught that the ultimate act of love was selfless love. That meant sacrificing everything including my health for the well being of others. Today, I realize that taking care of myself by working out and eating right is the ulimate act of self love and self less love. This act is for me, my family and God. Taking care of ourselves shows respect for God's or Natures creation. It also ensures to ourselves and family that we will be around for a long time.

Just in advance I would ask you to forgive my typos and grammatical errors and I will make plenty of them. I look forward to sharing my long journey towards self reflection, good health and a little bit of mommy hood. The only question left is will you join me? Feel free to share your journey. God bless.